Wednesday, September 24, 2008

The not so quiet life of MRS. Whispers- part II

When I started blogging, I thought I would be able to share tons of "Funny Ryan Stories" with the world, but as it turns out, most of his funny stories are pretty inappropriate. I want to share them, but I'm embarrassed at the thought of who might be reading this. It's not like Ryan is a child- which would make his "Ryanisms" innocent, and therefore, more acceptable. So PLEASE, somebody be the type of person to let me know I have broccoli stuck in my teeth and tell me if I'm making a mistake by sharing this type of information.


We sit down at the table to eat dinner, and I see Ryan rearranging my table setting. (This is not the first time he's set things up this way)

Hey, what does this look like?
Me: (sarcastically) Haha, very funny. My salt & pepper shakers do not look like balls.
Ryan: Sorry, but they do.
Me: No, they don't. They are perfect circles. Balls are shriveled up, like giant raisins. Balls are ugly. 
Ryan: No they're not, I like them.
Me: (trying to make him feel stupid) You like BALLS?
Ryan: I like my balls.
Me: You are CONCEDED about your BALLS?
Ryan: (smirking) Yeah... (with a "matter-of-fact" tone of voice) they're pretty big. 

I laughed so hard I cried. He was serious. Sometimes I'm pretty sure I'm married to a 15 year old. 


ruth said...


rookie cookie said...

I just read this whole thing to Ethan. At the end, he replied, "They are. I have seen them."

So there you have it Ryan. You have a real eye witness.

Beth said...

yes, I'm giggling . . . Give us more :)

Christy said...

Just the word BALLS makes me laugh. And yes, your salt shakers just make one THINK of BALLS and I probably would have rearranged your table decorations to look like what he did. My brain just goes there. And YES Of COURSE you can keep writing. We NEED you to.

Jill said...

Perfect way to begin my day. Keep those little anecdotes coming.

Shannon said...

hee hee . . . you said balls.

PS-I think we ALL married closet 14 year old boys.

Jones Family said...

I can totally hear your conversation as I read it. I love it... Ryanisms are like R-rated Ollisms... I wonder what Ollie will say when he's 27??? Sorry Ruth.

Crystal said...